Embracing The Freedom of Gray Hair

It is astounding to me how much time I was spending each day trying to hide my gray hair until I decided to stop. I never really realized how much energy, time, and money went into eluding the world to my reality until I stopped. Why did I stop? I looked in the mirror one day and realized that this battle I was fighting would be an endless one that I would never win.

It took some time for me to get used to my reflection in the mirror and the drastic change in my appearance. In the early days, I would actually experience a moment of shock each time I looked in the bathroom mirror it seemed to only be the bathroom mirror for some reason I'm not sure why. The shock I felt was of how the look of my Gray hair was just stunning to me. As time went on I also came to see that this change symbolized a deeper sense of freedom and acceptance for me, primarily me accepting myself, as for society I knew that would be a longer road to acceptance.

While we are not yet fully there, I do feel that things are shifting. I feel that society is beginning to accept gray hair as just another hair color, a stylish natural choice, and not only just related to age or aging the whole "gray is old stigma" that has been the reason for the endless hours that myself and others have spent using every tool in our toolkit to hide those grays at all costs.

The acceptance of gray hair is evolving, society is catching up be it at a slower pace than we would like but progress is progress. I believe this progress is possible as more and more natural gray hair people come out from the shadows, it forces people to see the reality that even people under 40 & 50 have natural gray hair. Forcing this out into the open will work to slowly change societal views on aging and beauty as they have been traditionally tied to hair color and youth.

Embracing Freedom

You will never truly appreciate the level of freedom, the layers that you shed once you stop, and embrace your true self, the freedom of not conforming to society's expectations. I no longer rush to the hairdresser on my 6-week hair coloring rotation only to have my gray roots visible by the end of the 2nd week. Then it was a cycle of coloring sticks and various products to hide my roots for another week and a half...I remember one time I ran out of hair coloring sticks and discovered that day I could use mascara in a pinch ( what a rabbit hole ). After a week and a half of brushing in coloring each morning, the growth would be too much to hide so it was now time to wear my wig for the next week and a half or two until I was back to the hairdresser for my coloring. This was my cycle, this was my life endless amounts of money and time spent at the hairdresser going so frequently, going to the hair store spending money on temporary coloring products, and on wigs to keep my look fresh. Not to mention I was limited to certain hairstyles when the gray roots were showing. It's crazy to me when I look back at it now, I didn't even have the freedom to do my hair however I wanted whenever I wanted because I would risk showing my roots! I would never go on a date or such during the wig period for fear that if the wig was removed I would be exposed and horrified. The only way I can describe the feeling of freedom is "waiting to exhale" Well I have now exhaled.

Looking around we can see that there are many public figures making the silver choice nowadays and while it's true many of them were forced down this path during the pandemic it's nice to see they made the decision to embrace it rather than reverting.

Are you considering making the transition? Are you still on the fence? Ask yourself the questions below and be truthful to yourself.

1. Do you feel trapped in an endless hair cycle?

2. At any point has your hair changed or impacted a decision you make?

3. Do you feel you are lacking the ability to express your true self?

Being honest and truthful to yourself is the first step in the process and once you have done that you will quickly realize what is truly important to you. There are emotional and psychological benefits to accepting gray hair. Understanding what is most important to you can often lead to greater confidence and a more positive self-image as you embrace the change. Once you have made your decision then the hard part starts "transitioning" The growth out phase certainly has its challenges but there are ways to navigate those challenges just know that everyone does it differently, you will need to find what works for you and I will certainly cover "transitioning" in another post.

Simple updo with messy bun

For now, I encourage you to explore the possibilities of what the freedom of embracing your gray hair could look like for you. View your gray hair not as something you should fear but instead view it as a beautiful expression of your own individuality, a part of who you are, and embrace the freedom in that.

If you are already living that freedom then share your story, I would love to hear how that transition was for you.